My Job

April 22, 2008

I am the kind of dog that needs a job. Some dogs like me get jobs herding sheep, but there are no sheep where I live, only rocket people, and they are too fast to herd. So my job is guarding things! Here are the things that I guard:

  1. My human!
  2. My human’s house
  3. Brusca’s house and humans *

When I am on guard, I watch everything and everybody to make sure they are Authorized. When I am out for a walk with my human, other people can be out walking too, but if they are just standing on the sidewalk, or start coming towards my human, that is Unauthorized. I stand in front of my human and look at them until she says it is OK, and then we keep going.

Monsters by the curb are Unauthorized.

People in disguise are Unauthorized.

Noisy crows are Unauthorized.

Strange people walking through my yard are very Unauthorized!

I like my job and I am very good at it. I am also good at chasing things, including giant chickens. I heard that giant chickens have been attacking postal workers, maybe I could get a job with them! I could chase the giant chickens away! Oh wait. They would probably ask me if I have ever tampered with the U.S. Mail, and I would have to say yes.

I think I will keep the job I have.

* I do not guard Brusca, because she can take care of herself. She does not bark much, but when she does, she says “WOOF” very loud, and then everyone stops.


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